Christmas is more about a life worth living then just one day...

Christ·mas

[kris-muhs]  Show IPA

noun

1. the annual festival of the Christian church commemorating the birth of Jesus: celebrated on December 25 and now generally observed as a legal holiday and an occasion for exchanging gifts.

  Christmas is a time that we celebrate the birth of Jesus Christ.  As many historians speculate on when the actual birth date of Jesus was, most say without certainty that they believe that it was around August.   The Romans celebrated a festival around this time that was not very flattering toward peace on earth and good will toward man.  According the Origin of Christmas, "Roman pagans first introduced the holiday of Saturnalia, a week long period of lawlessness celebrated between December 17-25.  During this period, Roman courts were closed, and Roman law dictated that no one could be punished for damaging property or injuring people during the weeklong celebration.  The festival began when Roman authorities chose “an enemy of the Roman people” to represent the “Lord of Misrule.”  Each Roman community selected a victim whom they forced to indulge in food and other physical pleasures throughout the week.  At the festival’s conclusion, December 25^th, Roman authorities believed they were destroying the forces of darkness by brutally murdering this innocent man or woman."  Obviously, as Rome became "Christian" under Emperor Constantine, this tradition gradually changed over the year (many many years) and had its back and forth moment, but eventually Christmas, as we know it, came around to the holiday that we celebrate today.I guess what surprises me most in how both conservative and liberal groups get so bent out of shape.  Seriously, how can you hate something or someone or the idea of something or someone?  Lack of forgiveness is the pathway to eternal imprisonment.

To challenge our Christian friends who are so animate about protecting our freedom religions, I would encourage them to take a step back to our founding fathers and to our founding universities (schools like Harvard and Stanford and so on, when students had to be fluent in Latin and had to defend and define their relationship with Jesus Christ).   Don't get me wrong, there are always times that we have a right to fight (defending our constitutional rights is very important), we just need to find Jesus in all that we do.

Let me ask a question this way:  Do we celebrate Jesus once a year (Christmas), twice a year (Easter?) or everyday of our life.  Let's put it this way:  How many of us Christians practice Coram Deo.  Everything under the Sun is under God and He is over everything.  Do we, Christians who profess Jesus Christ as Savior, live our lives each day with Jesus with us (in us through His Holy Spirit)?

How about this, instead of pointing to the light of Jesus once or twice or a few times a year....why don't we let our light shine everyday of the year.  The transforming power of Jesus's birth, death and resurrection is our daily process of sanctification in becoming more like Him and less like us.  To tell the world about him with how we live our lives daily.

Your thoughts?

Blessings,

Dante

The Pinterest Generation

As my wife and I are working diligently after we put the kids to bed, after we worked on Christmas gift-wrapping and catching up on filing and the whole lot, I decided to ask my wife some questions:  What do you think women struggle must with.  The answer(s) surprised me, well, not really.  But what it did give me was some deeper insight into the everyday lives of our wives and mothers of our children.  Here it goes:

• You can never get it done
• You can never have the time to give your all to everything
• You can never do enough
• True friendships can be difficult
• Feeling adequate enough
• Never have time for yourself
• Constant worry about not screwing up with our kids
• Comparison - (we live in a Pinterest generation)

I want to start this post out on the last one - the Pinterest Generation.  When we think about it, this does not just apply to our wives (the mothers of our children) this really applies to all of us - we, even in our best intentions, still find ourselves comparing each other.  The Pinterest generation finds us comparing each other in how we do everything and some doing it better and better and more and more and faster and faster.  Let me start by saying that there is nothing wrong with Pinterest, Facebook, Social Media in general and Media in general.  As long as we keep our priorities straight and do these things in moderation - meaning, we don't make them our gods.  That being said, how do we survive in a world that continues to do it better and better and more and more and faster and faster - how can we keep up?  How can we cope?  Oh my goodness, I am getting stressed and worked up just thinking about all these things.

First of all, if you are a spouse and a parent like me, then you realize that about 9 out of 10 times you are exhausted.  You are, to say the least, fatigued.  So how do we get our priorities straight?  How can we even remotely find biblical contentment?  How can we let go and let God drive our lives daily:

1. Let's start with prayer - "not my will be done, Lord, YOUR WILL BE DONE....
2. Have a safe, non-judge-mental (guys - this doesn't mean we try and fix it during the talk) conversation with our spouse.  This means raw honesty, success and failures, short-comings and where are we going with this tomorrow, next week, 1 year, 5 years...
3. Pray some more
4. Have an honest talk with our accountability partners (for me, this is with my men of faith (men's group), my accountability partners (Bob, Charlie, Dave, Bob and Jim) - be honest with our short-comings and what we need to be accountable with (things we need to work on...).  For women, this means your ladies, women's group, small group (ladies)...etc.,
5. If we don't have those relationships - pray for them
6. Read Scripture daily - meditate, prayer time, quiet time to listen for God's voice in our daily lives
7. Pray some more
8. Stop comparing - God made us!  We are fearfully and wonderfully made - he didn't make any mistakes when he created us
9. Make healthy choices - sleep, diet, exercise, mental exercise (read), less media inputs (less idols) and more God-time
10. Journal

The hardest part about life is trying to be someone or something that you aren't.  Simply said, we have to learn our strengths and our weaknesses and to be real with them.  For instance, when you look at community (church, social clubs, events and so on) you see a few people doing so much that they are effectively becoming ineffective.  I don't want you to take that wrong - God looks at our heart.  I love when people serve!  That is a call to being a disciple of Christ.  What I mean is this:  What if, instead of trying to do everything and just being okay or above average on all the things we try to do, we try to learn our gift set (spiritual gifts) and use those in the best and most efficient way to give to God out of the thankfulness of our heart for all he has done for us...

What if we learned what God means by being biblically content:  Philippians 4:11-13; 1 Timothy 6: 6-11.

• With God, we can do all things
• Without God, these things are all fruitless
• With God, we can take his paths that He will make straight
• Without God's direction we can face ruin and calamity
• With God, we can let him love, protect and care and raise our children
• Without God, we will see the fruit of our labor in our children (will they take our faith seriously without God
• With God, we can rest in Him because his yoke is easy
• Without God we can count on burning out

In all things, seek His Will and His way through his Word (Jesus Christ).  I like it said like this:

Colossians 3:17

English Standard Version (ESV)

¹⁷ And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.

More to say, more to do, and more to lean on God and not my own understanding.

Your thoughts?

Dante

The Secret of Leadership You Should Teach Your Children

This morning, I had an insightful conversation with a 30-something single mother.  She shared with me that she had her son at age 19, did not attend college and she also mentioned that she had lost her job of 10 years after the 2008 mortgage crisis.  She now has to take minimum wage jobs just to make ends meet and shared with me her struggles and dreams to provide a better life for her son.

At times during the conversation, she would belittle herself for some of her life decisions such as sleeping with the wrong man at age 19 and she was embarrassed at the fact that she was working at a minimum wage job.  Every time she did this, I would tell her that her life struggles and hard work were a much better example for her son than all the wealth in the world.  She then secretly shared with me how proud her son was when she finally obtained a job after 2 years of unemployment, applications and interviews

This morning dose of reality and humility made me think about a presentation I gave on leadership to a large organization a few years ago.  I started the presentation by comparing the difference between Management and Leadership and stating why most people mistake the two.  Next, I explained why leadership was illusive but powerful.

Leadership comes from influence not from a title.

I‘ve worked with many organizations where the key influencers were not the people in charge.  Many times in many organizations, there are people making things happen behind the scenes and they hold the admiration and trust of those organizations.  These people are the influencers.  The next logical question is always:  How do you obtain influence?

Influence comes from many traits: authenticity, initiative, selfless service and empathy.  Nevertheless, one of the consistent traits I see in influencers is moral authority.

Moral Authority is walking the walk; congruence between words and actions or another way to put it is simply - Character.

There was a time in our history when a handshake was your word and honor and you would defend it to the death, literally. You didn’t need a contract or an attorney as long as someone gave you his or her word.  Leaders would resign willingly if their character was ever in question rather than having to be forced out.

The masses will always follow people with character.  People naturally and willingly allow themselves to be influenced by those of character and when leaders do not exhibit character, they pay the price, many times with their position, wealth and influence.

If there is one mantra I beat to the ground repeatedly on Legacy Dad and in my teachings, and conferences, it’s for parents to focus on Character above all other areas minus faith.

Often what we label as leadership is an overflow of character and influence.

The single mother I talked with was influencing her son by her character, humility and work ethic.  This lesson is more important that any STEM or Magnet School you can buy and the ripples of this influence will echo throughout your children’s lives.

I don’t care what your education level is, how much money you make, or how successful you are.  If you lack character, ultimately you will fall and learn a painful life lesson in the process.  Politicians, Celebrities, and Leaders in Business often endure this fall while the whole world watches.

Studies by Dr. Thomas Stanley on the personality traits of the most successful people in their perspective fields: Doctors, Lawyers, Salespeople, Engineers, Scientists, CEO’s, etc. all unanimously said that Character was the #1 trait that made them who they are.

According to these leaders, the college they went to, grades they received or socio-economic advantages in their lives had little effect on their overall success.  In fact, these areas did not even make the top 10 list.  So I always preach to parents, focus on character and everything else will fall into place.

Influence or Character cannot be bought with a title, wealth or education.  It is honed by practicing what we preach on a consistent, daily basis and our kids are watching and learning from us every single day.  If you ever meet me in person, there is one thing you’ll realize quickly – my writings on this blog are my word and my real life.  My friends, family and even my pastors read these entries. To one extent, it’s a great form of accountability.

So now that I’ve etched a framework for you, the next few posts are going to focus on how we build character, not only in ourselves but in our children on a daily and consistent basis.

Stay Tuned.

Top 10 things to do before Christmas Day

It's Christmas time again.  It is time to celebrate the birth of Jesus.  I find it funny how we (society) spends just over 4 weeks getting ready to celebrate the birth of Jesus.  Actually, in the last 10 years I would venture to state that pure secularism and commercialism has made this Season more and more about ourselves and what "I" want versus the reason for the Season:  Jesus!So, that being said, I decided to make a top 10 list of things to do before Christmas (for Legacy Dads):

1. Read Luke 2 (to your family and friends)
2. Shop for a charity (Angels of Hope or any notable charity and teach your family the value of giving
3. Help a family struggling this season - Sponsor a family in need (you can do this discreetly or ask  your church office for permission to contact someone in need)
4. Donate your time, talent and treasure this season to Jesus - think on these things first before yourselves
5. Give love and time to your loved ones
6. Serve your wife everyday when you come home from work (we call this the "SECOND SHIFT" - thanks Matt Chandler)
7. Serve your kids everyday -give them your attention and time all the way up to bedtime - read stories, play tag, play a board game, tell them about Jesus and the God's love Story
8. Read the bible every day
9. Pray every day
10. Listen to the Holy Spirit (they quiet voice in you nudging you to do God's will and not your own

What are some of your top tens?

Dante

Dads, you don't need a manual, rather, you need Immanuel

Dad's, Men of Faith, Countrymen (those of us who are adopted sons of God)....I may have referenced an old TV show called the Greatest American Hero.  It had two men that were walking thru life together, one was a government employee while the other found the suit.  They both lost the manual that explained how to use the suit to be a superhero, so they had to have trials and tribulations along the way to use the suit.  Some times I feel like we try to do that in our spiritual lives along with our everyday work lives.  That is, we are trying to figure out the secret to life and to be the best dad, the best husband, the best men that the world has.  The trying is clearly altruistic, but the way we get there is flawed.  What I mean to say is that we have to change our trajectory.  We have to re-set our sights in order to be the marksmen that God calls us to be.  WE have to set our targets on the One whom all blessings flow - Jesus Christ.Dads, we don't need a manual, rather, we need Immanuel.  Matthew 1:22-23, (ESV) "²² All this took place to fulfill what the Lord had spoken by the prophet: ²³ “Behold, the virgin shall conceive and bear a son,     and they shall call his name Immanuel” (which means, God with us)."  For those of us that profess Jesus Christ as Lord, then we have Immanuel - God is with us!  His Holy Spirit is in us!  What more could we ask for.  He gave us his Word, The Bible.  If we set our sights on Him and we focus on His words for our lives then we can reclaim that which God gives us - his storehouse of blessings and love beyond belief.

This afternoon I had coffee with a great friend of mine, who is also an Elder with me at our church.  A lot of times we just share and talk about life and its pings and pangs along the way.  He holds me accountable (along with a few others in my life).  I like that.  Today, he told me that he was worried about me last week and that he was waiting to ask me what was going on.  I love that.  I love that he noticed something about me and wasn't going to let me go at it alone.  That is why God calls us to go 2x2 in ministry.  Not to do this alone, as Lance so eloquently put it in this past post.  God has a plan for us.  A plan not to harm us, but to prosper us.  Please note that I am not talking about riches and wealth in worldly terms (as some might do), rather, I am talking about the abundant life that he promises to those who love and obey him.

I think a lot of problems that we, as Christians have, is that we forget Immanuel and try to make up our own manual.  Thereby making our lives and our agenda our gods (small "g").  We need to give up these scrawny manuals and give in to God's Immanuel for each and every one of our lives.

Where can you start:

1.  Read his word EVERYDAY (commit to it today)

2. Join a bible believing, Holy Spirit filled Church and Serve

3. Get involved in a men's group and/or Mini-Church

4.  Give up your manual and accept God's Immanuel

5.  _______________________  (what are some of your places to start and work through?)

Blessings,

Dante

A bored man in the house is a very dangerous thing...

Are you bored?  Does your life have purpose?  Are you being a good steward with your time, talent and treasures?  Or do you find yourself bored with Life, Work and your Existence?As I continue to process and reflect on the recent ActLikeMen conference that they had in Indianapolis, IN,  one statement that was made by one of Speakers was, "A bored man at home is a very dangerous thing."  This is true on so many levels that I decided to do some searching through Scripture on this:  2 Timothy 2:22  ESV “So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart.”  2 Timothy 2:15  ESV “Do your best to present yourself to God as one approved, a worker who has no need to be ashamed, rightly handling the word of truth.”

Some Causes of Boredom:

1) Over stimulated (television, computers, social media, travel-clubs, activities that take us away from fellowship and community with God)

2) Avoidance - (we disconnect and avoid being committed to a relationship, to a job and to friends)

3) Under Committed (we do not follow through with our relationships with 1) God 2) Our Spouse 3) Our Children 4) Our Church 5) Our careers 6) Our neighbors)

4) Too Busy

5) Lack of Conviction

6) No Contentment

7) No identity

When I think about this statement I came to the realization that I am a father of three young children ranging from 6 to 10 years of age.  As an active man, I find myself being very active in work, church and community (between being a husband, father, elder, men's ministry leader, friend, partner so many more facets in my life).  I used to feel really guilty about being tired and feeling like I cannot keep up with the daily jaunts of this life, however, at the conference, I find that it is good for a man (spiritual leader) to be the tired.  That means that we are doing our job as long as we can:  1) Put God first 2) We read his Word daily 3) We pray 4) we have accountability 5) We engage our family 6) We continue to pursue  our  wives and children.  Does this mean that we always get these priorities straight?  What if we are just beginning this journey to turn it around?

Do not be discouraged no matter what.  Your identity is no longer in yourself (if you profess the name of the Lord Jesus), rather, you are a son of God.  We are all adopted and engrafted into his family.  Do not buy the lies of society.  Read and learn and memorize the word of God.  Our hope is not in the things of this world.  Our hope is in our God.  So if you read this and you find yourself bored then take action.  Get off the couch and stop just being (settling), instead realize that God has a purpose for each of us.

STARTING POINT:

1) Check your attitude at the door (we are not here to serve ourselves and our wants and our treasure, we are hear to use of gifts of time, talent and treasure to honor God and to serve Jesus)

2) Change your attitude

• Say goodbye to the ideology that you can't
• Say goodbye to the ideology that you are too tired
• Say hello to the word "yes" with your wife and kids
• Say hello to spending more and more time with your wife and kids instead of doing what you want to do
• Say hello to your second shift (serve your wife and family - be the spiritual leader that God calls us to be)

3) Live each day like it is your last

4) Be thankful for the gifts that God has given us as men (borrowed from the move The Ultimate Gift)

• Gift of Work
• Gift of Money
• Gift of Friends
• Gift of Learning
• Gift of Problems
• Gift of Family
• Gift of Laughter
• Gift of Dreams
• Gift of Giving
• Gift of Gratitude
• Gift of a day
• Gift of Love

5) Be passionate

• About God
• About Jesus
• About The Spirit
• About your wife
• About your kids
• About your church
• About your work
• About your friends
• About your neighbors
• About your community

6) Persevere

• James 1 (ESV) Greeting 1 James, a servant^[a] of God and of the Lord Jesus Christ, To the twelve tribes in the Dispersion: Greetings.

  Testing of Your Faith ² Count it all joy, my brothers,^[b] when you meet trials of various kinds, ³ for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. ⁴ And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.

  ⁵ If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him. ⁶ But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea that is driven and tossed by the wind. ⁷ For that person must not suppose that he will receive anything from the Lord; ⁸ he is a double-minded man, unstable in all his ways.

  ⁹ Let the lowly brother boast in his exaltation, ¹⁰ and the rich in his humiliation, because like a flower of the grass^[c] he will pass away. ¹¹ For the sun rises with its scorching heat and withers the grass; its flower falls, and its beauty perishes. So also will the rich man fade away in the midst of his pursuits.

  ¹² Blessed is the man who remains steadfast under trial, for when he has stood the test he will receive the crown of life, which God has promised to those who love him. ¹³ Let no one say when he is tempted, “I am being tempted by God,” for God cannot be tempted with evil, and he himself tempts no one. ¹⁴ But each person is tempted when he is lured and enticed by his own desire. ¹⁵ Then desire when it has conceived gives birth to sin, and sin when it is fully grown brings forth death.

  ¹⁶ Do not be deceived, my beloved brothers. ¹⁷ Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change.^{[d] 18} Of his own will he brought us forth by the word of truth, that we should be a kind of firstfruits of his creatures.

7) Live by these words:

• Ecclesiastes 9:10 (ESV) ¹⁰ Whatever your hand finds to do, do it with your might,^[a]for there is no work or thought or knowledge or wisdom in Sheol, to which you are going."  
• Colossians 3:17 (ESV) ¹⁷ And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.

8) Finish Well - live life so that when you die you will hear our Savior say, "well done thou good and faith servant!"

What are some of your thoughts on this?

Let us know,

D

An unguarded strength is a double weakness...

There are things that I really like about men's conferences, leadership conferences, and so on.  Things that give us fresh insight and/or things that we want to do different or augment in our lives.  Things that we are going to change.  And if we are all honest, for those of us that go to these conferences, we find ourselves for the first week (few weeks, months or slightly thereafter) doing these things that we say we are going to do and THEN life steps back in and we lose our focus and our way.  Whether we are too busy at work or too busy at home or too busy at church or just plain too busy in all jaunts of life, we just set back into our old ways.  Our old self nature - it's just too easy, like sin in our lives.For some of us, though, things are different.  Something connected our spirit to our hearts and minds.  Something poked a chord and or a nerve in our lives and we realized that, "yes I have been lax", and/or, "yes, I need to change the way that I do that."  This past weekend was like that for me.  Greg Laurie spoke on Friday night and used this phrase, "an unguarded strength is a double weakness."  So often in life, if I reflect and look back on my journal(s), I can be brutally honest and say that this does happen to me, more so than not if I really want to be honest.  This doesn't make me a bad dad or poor husband or whatever conclusion society could draw, rather, it makes me ineffective as a spiritual leader.   It makes me neutralized as dad and as an effective husband.

Before you condemn me reading this post, realize that I am condemning myself.   At the ActLikeMen conference Matt Chandler said something very poignant in that when we get home from our days jobs (whatever shift you work) that we still have shift 2 and shift 3 to handle and to engage and to finish.  That is, to serve our wives and our children if God has blessed us with them.  We need to start acting like men.  Now before I totally throw myself under the bus, I want to say that there are things that my wife will say that I do really good:  1) I help clean (kitchen, etc.,) 2) I help with Laundry, 3) I help with the bedtime and homework and the like, BUT if I am really honest I can do so much more for my family.  For instance,  I could do the following:

Set the Pace - Honestly I am blown away at the pace at which culture/society tells us to travel.  Let's be honest, if work was given full access to our lives some of us could work 70, 80 and over 100 hours and still have "to-do lists".  Travel Sports (don't get me going on this one) Hobbies and Park District activities and for some families (if they have time for other things) - Youth Group.  I can Set the Pace by being intentional on how I pray, how I read God's word and apply it to my daily life and I can create a healthy balance for my family between chores, homework and fun times with Mom & Dad & Friends and Family.

Time Management - The Hebrew day (back before electricity) was 6am to 6pm and then goodnight.  If we are modern family and our kids go to school then your morning looks like this:  Mom and Dad wakes up, Kids wake up, Eat Breakfast, Change clothes, wash up (teeth brushed), Drive to School, Kids at school all day and mom and dad work from home (or at work) and so on.  There are only 24 hours in a day (and God likes us to be orderly and good stewards with our time, talent and treasure), that being said, we only have so much time in a day.  Teach our kids the gift of time.  I can do this by being an example not a sloth at home.

Give them Stewardship - I have to teach my family the value of God's time, talent and treasure that he has given me through His promise of giving us His Spirit.  That is, each one of us that has professed the name of Jesus Christ as Savior has been given fruit of the Spirit (Spiritual Gifts) to honor God.  I have to set the priorities that are so important in this order:  God, Family, Church, Work, Friends and Other.   I have to put God first in everything and as Spiritual leader I have to put my wife and family next.  The more that my family sees Jesus in me and how I serve with the gifts that he has entrusted in me, the better I serve my wife and kids, the better they inherit this stewardship and the better my lot will go at the Judgement Seat of Christ (goal = to hear our Redeemer say, "well done thou good and faithful servant.").  Teach them the value of money (to tithe, to save and how much to spend.  Live it, let them know that you practice what you preach - this is true accountability.

Be Bold - Act like men in showing your kids the strength of Jesus when you serve them.  No matter what life brings me (through trial and tribulation) show them your love and grace and mercy.  Show them that it is okay to hurt, to cry and to struggle, but show them also your unwavering faith.  Be Bold in love.  Be bold in truth and Be bold in serving.

Arm Them - The word of God is bold and effective and able to separate bone from marrow.  It is a double-edge sword.  It is truth.  Own the truth, know the word and work on memory with your children.  The more that they own the more that they will carry with them into adulthood.  Teach them to pray.  Teach them to pray for the Armor of God (Read Ephesians 6).

What are some of your lists?

As for me, this past weekend taught me an extremely valuable lesson, not only to guard my 6 (with brothers that I call men of Faith and Lance) also to doubly guard my strengths.  I can do this by daily reading of the Bible, Praying continually.  Seeking that quiet time with God (listening for his voice).  To have accountability in my life (not just from my wife, but from brothers who will be brutal and honest in love).

Blessings,

D

Unpacking the Actlikemen Conference, part 1 of 3 (or more)

This past weekend 12,600 + volunteers went to Indianapolis, Indiana to attend the third of three Act Like Men Conferences (2 in the US and 1 in Canada).  Lance and I met down there on Friday night and his son blessed us with his presence as well.  I am so thankful for all the men that accompanied me this past weekend.   I am thankful for Lance and his son serving this weekend as we sponsored the event.  I am so thankful for the men of God that brought the truth to us in an incredibly short amount of time with such a large plethora of God's words and teaching to unpack during the conference.  My head is still reeling from this event.  Actually, Lance and I several years ago talked about a men's event that we wanted to do, called "Man Up".  I think these men stole our idea or at least a lot of LegacyDad material (JUST KIDDING).  These men speak truth and these men speak from the same authority that we speak on - the Holy Bible.  The Spirit within us and having brothers and our wives holding us accountable.All of this being said, a few things that really struck home for me (personally):

• A man, who is bored and with a lot of energy at home is VERY DANGEROUS
• An unguarded strength is a double weakness
• We all do not need a manual, rather IMMANUEL
• Un-repented sin in our lives is like a lion that we keep hidden (an average lion can move 100 yards in 3 seconds) so be careful trying to entertain sin and trying to worship God

As a husband, a dad, a full-time worker, an Elder and a leader of men's ministry - I have a lot on my plate.  I continually check myself at the door of humility and try to remember my priorities:  God, Family, Church, Work, Friends and Community.  I don't always get this order right and I often fail even when I do.  However, I have brothers in my life who speak brutal truth in my life.  I have brothers (in Christ) who love me and do not judge me.  I have brothers who encourage, comfort and urge me to live a life worthy of God.  I call these brothers of mine - Men of Faith (which is also the name of our Men's Group at church).  I walked away from this confident feeling both happy and sad at the same time.  For the sad, I realized just how many at this conference do not have what we have in Men of Faith.  I felt sad because so many men (even in our church) miss the blessing of accountability and confession in men's groups.  I also felt sad in realizing just how many men need this but do not take the time to put this very thing into practice in their lives.

In 1 Thessalonians 2:11-12 (NIV) we read, "¹¹ For you know that we dealt with each of you as a father deals with his own children, ¹² encouraging, comforting and urging you to live lives worthy of God, who calls you into his kingdom and glory."  This is so important not only in ministry but in everyday life.  Often we find this sort of thing counter-cultural in that the world tells us to believe the "Lone Wolf McQuaid" way of life in which we can do this on our own.  This is exactly what the devil and his minions want from us - to be isolated and alone wallowing in our own sinful lives.  If we took it to God's way then we would turn to Galatians 6 and read the following, "6 Brothers and sisters, if someone is caught in a sin, you who live by the Spirit should restore that person gently. But watch yourselves, or you also may be tempted. ² Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ. ³ If anyone thinks they are something when they are not, they deceive themselves. ⁴ Each one should test their own actions. Then they can take pride in themselves alone, without comparing themselves to someone else, ⁵ for each one should carry their own load. ⁶ Nevertheless, the one who receives instruction in the word should share all good things with their instructor. ⁷ Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows. ⁸ Whoever sows to please their flesh, from the flesh will reap destruction; whoever sows to please the Spirit, from the Spirit will reap eternal life. ⁹ Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. ¹⁰ Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers."

An unguarded strength is a double weakness - this has so many avenues attached to it - being overwhelmed at home, at work, at church, in the community, with our friends.....a simple way to put this is to say by just living life we can forget to be in the word daily.  To pray continuously.  To have accountability and to confess our sins to others.  We are not telling you to confess to a priest or to have a man forgive us, quite the contrary.  Rather, by confessing out loud, then we no longer have that sin in the darkness like a lion in our dark closet.  We bring it into the light (to our brothers) and we give others permission to hold us accountable to and to take a proverbial "2x4" to us when we are not walking the right path (in love not in anger).  And by bringing this to the light, we have repentance to God the Father through his son Jesus Christ giving honor to the Triune God who will be pleased with our repentance.  When I am tired, fatigued, worked over by work, co-workers, family and friends (so much to do with so little time - come on - we all have those weeks) I find myself being un-guarded.  As I looked at my journal when I got home, I could see the pattern of being ill-prepared in spiritual warfare and falling/failing to daily jaunts of temptation and the like.   Sometimes, when this occurs, my strengths become a double weakness - this was a very good lesson for me to hear this past weekend.

There is so much more to say.  The next few posts will focus on:

• The hidden lion in our lives
• A bored man in my house
• What's your excuse, man up...

Looking forward to hearing from you?  Who else was there?  Let Lance and I know what you want to hear...email me here:

Blessings,

Dante