Encouraging your kids...

One thing that I have to keep reminding myself of when raising my kids is to remember what my purpose is as daddy:

1 Thessalonians 2:11-12

11 For you know that we dealt with each of you as a father deals with his own children, 12 encouraging, comforting and urging you to live lives worthy of God, who calls you into his kingdom and glory.

img_6562edb&wDeuteronomy 6:6-9 And you must commit yourselves wholeheartedly to these commands that I am giving you today. 7 Repeat them again and again to your children. Talk about them when you are at home and when you are on the road, when you are going to bed and when you are getting up. 8 Tie them to your hands and wear them on your forehead as reminders. 9 Write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates.

I am supposed to raise my children to love the Lord with all their heart, their mind, body and soul.  I am supposed to make my faith real to them.  I am supposed to love them, comfort them and encourage them to live a life worthy of the Lord - simply said, without Jesus, then there is none worthy, no not one. Point being, I need to live in such a way that I make Jesus real to them in order that they will love him and trust him as Savior.

IMG_0816As a parent (and a husband), I find myself keenly aware of other parenting when we are in public and traveling.  I often find myself very critical of other parents and discuss this with my wife.  Recently traveling through Spring Break, we heard this mother continuing to yell at her kids and degrading them in public.  I told my wife that I could not believe how the parent could do this and how the kids disobeyed, BUT then that very evening (in the hotel room) I find my wife and I (both tired from 5.5 hours of driving) doing the very same thing that this parent was doing earlier - I don't want to be that parent.

IMG_5745I wonder if we could take a hidden camera of our parenting for one week and then replay all the good and the bad and sometimes even the ugly.  I wonder if we could imagine if many other people (say the national TV audience) were going to view this - if our behavior and attitudes would change us?  Then I wonder, for those of us who are born again (saved) by Christ - if we would be good in remembering that Jesus Christ resides in each of us through His holy spirit.  You see, God is watching us every day, every hour and every minute of how we steward our time as parents, as his soldiers.

Are we encouraging, comforting and urging our children to fear the Lord and to love others.  Are we encouraging them to live a life worthy of God?

What are you doing today to do that?  In what ways this past week have you encouraged your child(ren) in loving the lord with all their heart, mind, body and soul?

Thoughts?

Let us know,Dante

SOME OTHER SCRIPTURE:

Proverbs 22:6 Direct your children onto the right path, and when they are older, they will not leave it.

Colossians 3:21 Fathers, do not aggravate your children, or they will become discouraged.

Isaiah 54:13 I will teach all your children, and they will enjoy great peace.

Psalm 113:9 He gives the childless woman a family, making her a happy mother. Praise the Lord!

Psalm 127:3-5 Children are a gift from the Lord; they are a reward from him.

4 Children born to a young man are like arrows in a warrior’s hands.

5 How joyful is the man whose quiver is full of them! He will not be put to shame when he confronts his accusers at the city gates.

Psalm 139:13-16 You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body and knit me together in my mother’s womb.

14 Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvelous—how well I know it.

15 You watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion, as I was woven together in the dark of the womb.

16 You saw me before I was born. Every day of my life was recorded in your book. Every moment was laid out before a single day had passed.

Deuteronomy 4:9 “But watch out! Be careful never to forget what you yourself have seen. Do not let these memories escape from your mind as long as you live! And be sure to pass them on to your children and grandchildren.

Isaiah 38:19 The living, the living man, he shall praise You,

As I do this day; The father shall make known Your truth to the children.

2 Timothy 3:14-15 But you must continue in the things which you have learned and been assured of, knowing from whom you have learned them, 15 and that from childhood you have known the Holy Scriptures, which are able to make you wise for salvation through faith which is in Christ Jesus.

Matt: 19:14 But Jesus said, “Let the children come to me. Don’t stop them! For the Kingdom of Heaven belongs to those who are like these children.”

Matt 18:3 Then he said, “I tell you the truth, unless you turn from your sins and become like little children, you will never get into the Kingdom of Heaven.

 

 

My Son's Legacy Journey: The End of Phase I - Update One

ChanceThis week is an exciting week for me as my son is turning 14 years old and he is ending his first phase of my Legacy Dad Process with him.  You can also read The Foundation: What We Did From Ages 0-12 Part I, Part II and Part III  to get a better background and perspective on what we did to raise our children up until this point.During the past 2 years, my son has been reading a number of specially selected books that tell stories of courage, character and faith as well as teaching valuable life lessons.  After each chapter of a book, he would write in a special journal what the chapter was about and his own personal thoughts and reflections on the topic.  Also during these past two years, we have had a lot more candid talks on faith, life, manhood as well as a number of outings and special occasions that reinforce the traits he has been learning about.

He played on the football team and learned on and off the field the value of teamwork, loyalty and sacrifice.  He started dating his first girlfriends and as we taught him, went to meet each girls father on his own and explained his intentions to each one, man to man.  We spent a weekend in an abandoned mining town in the Oregon Mountains and came face to face with a mountain lion as well as spending a week climbing on Mount Rainier while building fires from scratch.  There were also numerous impromptu lessons that arose from life's simple quirks and turns and finally he is ready for his first personal test which will take place next weekend.  This test is still a secret to him and he will not know what it is until we are driving to it.

Once my son completes this first test, he will be given a special present to signify his passage into the next phase and presented with his first "letter" - a clue that will ultimately unlock the cypher box hidden in my steamer trunk. - Again see the Legacy Dad Process if you are lost here.letter

While I'll have tweaked this list slightly over the years, the following are the list of books my son read during these past two years.  Each one was selected to teach a specific character trait or life story.  While you can use this list in your own journeys with your own son's, I encourage you to tailor your list to his particular bent, interests and your own family story.  I'll be giving you updates throughout next weekend on our progress and his journey.

- Lance

Esse Quam Videri

12-14 Year Old Book List

The Lost Treasure of the Knights Templar - Steven Sora

The Lord of the Flies - William Golding

100 World Leaders Who Shaped World History - Kathy Paparchontis

The Case for Faith for Kids – Lee Strobel

Boys Of  Grit Series - Three Volumes by Wallace and Egermeir

A Young Man After God’s Own Heart - Jim George

Dismantled: An Honest Look at Some of Our Biggest Fears - Chad Norris and David Rhodes

Boyhood and Beyond: Practical Wisdom for Becoming a Man by Bob Schultz

Sua Sponte – Dick Couch

Do Hard Things: A Teenage Rebellion Against Low Expectations by Alex & Brett Harris

The Red Badge of Courage - Steven Crane

The Tracker – Tom Brown

Reallionaire - Farrah Gray

 

 

Overprotective Parents, Underdeveloped Children: Part 1

Overprotective parenting has run rampant in Christian circles during the past decade and every time I bring up this topic, I get slews of emails from parents who don't quite understand the topic but nonetheless disagree with me.I understand these parents are doing what they think is best, protecting their children from evil, but in the long run they are hurting their children.